Thursday, November 22, 2007
Carving the Turkey
First up, Happy American Thanksgiving to all my American readers.
One thing I give thanks for is good friends. I think they both know how important they are to me.
In particular, I'd like to give a big shout-out to my long-time real-life friend who goes by the blog name Grumps. He's hospitalized with some moderate health issues - not life threatening in any way but bad enough that they've got him on morphine.
It astounds me to realize that I've probably known Grumps longer than I've known what it's like to kiss a girl. Man, those five years just flew by, didn't they Grumps?
We've all heard the expression "I can't believe he had the gall to do that". This turns out to be quite literal in Grumps' case. Apparently his innards have gotten screwed up because he's still cranking out gall stones in spite of the fact that he had his gall bladder removed several years ago. (And, yes, "innards" is the medical term. Jeez, watch some House once in awhile, ya eejits!)
I'm not really clear on how that all works medically. Grumps is a well-known slackass and lay-about (he only works two jobs, after all), so this may all just be some lame excuse to get off work.
Alternately, his erectile dysfunction issues may have come back and he may have slapped together his cover story too quickly, forgetting that his gall bladder was already out.
Quite seriously, Grumps is like a brother to me and I wish I was there to check in on him, so just in case they have an Internet station at the hospital I wanted to embarrass him with a nice big public get-well-soon message.
I hope the doctors keep him doped up on morphine long enough that he is able to appreciate the humour of this post. The rest of you, I fear, will not enjoy such an advantage.
posted by Mentok @ 9:55 a.m.,
4 Comments:
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At 10:54 p.m.,
cchang said...
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Apparently his innards have gotten screwed up because he's still cranking out gall stones in spite of the fact that he had his gall bladder removed several years ago.
Come again?????
Well, I do hope your dear friend is doing better--surgery is never pleasant!
Happy US Turkey day indeed...I just consumed vast amounts of pumpkin ice cream, pumpkin pie and hot chocolate about an hour ago and can barely type! -
At 1:49 a.m.,
adam said...
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With best wishes to Grumps, the poor boy, but you just made me laugh out loud four times in as many paragraphs. Splendid work. Maybe this is what he needs to pep up his 'gallbladder'.
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At 12:49 p.m.,
FiL said...
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Maybe Grumps is an alien lifeform whose physiology boasts, inter alia, multiple gall bladders...
Nothing like illness to bring out compassion in friends & acquaintances!!!
Swift recovery, Grumps, and enjoy the morphine. -
At 8:32 a.m.,
Grumps said...
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Hey, I'm still alive. The docs scoped me out and even introduced me to my favourite new word: sphincterotomoy.
I discovered I'm the 1% of the population that can develop gallstones despite not having a gall bladder. Had I known that I might have realized my gallstone like pains were that and would have checked it out sooner. I waited a week and it turned into pancreatitis.
Anyway, after an 11 day stay (or vacation as Mentok sees it) in the hopsital I'm feeling normal again.
BTW, Mentok, the morphine was even better mixed with gravol but it couldn't hold a candle to the valium-demerol cocktail they gave me before my endoscopy. MMMMMMMM! Didn't feel a thing!
Thanks for the kind words and well- wishes. It's great to have friends.
