Wednesday, November 08, 2006
Polygamy
There's an attention grabbing title, eh wot?
Weirdo polygamist cults have been making the news in Canada and the US lately, so I thought it might be fun for us all to noodle about the topic.
Disclaimer: I have no personal interest in polygamy. My wife, Mrs. Mentok, is both beautiful and fearsome, like a great warrior queen. She is more than woman enough for me. Please don't hurt me, honey.
OK, with that out of the way.
It seems to me that polygamy is one of those things, like orgies or smoking cigars, which excite the male imagination but which are much, much more appealing in fantasy than in reality.
I suppose when most fellows imagine polygamy, they imagine themselves as buff, heroic Arabian princes surrounded by buxom I Dream of Jeannie beauties.
The seedy reality of polygamy in places like the notorious Bountiful BC colony is fat, poxied old men consorting with scrawny, pale, terrified 15 year old girls.
I don't think there can be much doubt this the traditional patriarchal form of polygamy - one man and many women - is an exploitive, repugnant institution on every level. The fact that the Old Testament version of Jehovah once tolerated this type of marriage says little about the nature of God but a great deal about the editorial licence taken by the authors.
Further, patriarchal polygamy would tend to destabilize society, since it allows some men effectively to stockpile sexual goods and services, shall we say, to the discontent of everyone else. Amongst our hominid brothers, the chimpanzees and the gorillas, polygamy is the single greatest source of political unrest and the cause of many very bloody political coups.
But while patriarchal polygamy is a no-go, there is another, more fantastical version of it that is fun to think about. On the departed Star Trek: Enterprise show, one of the alien characters, Dr. Flox came from a society with both-gender polygamy. He had six wives and each of his wives had up to five additional husbands.
What I find fascinating about this model of polygamy are not the prurient aspects but the socio-political ones. People in such a society would be bound much more closely to one another since virtually everyone in the society would be related by marriage.
In one's immediate family (the people who would have an interest in showing up to a child's music recital, namely one's self, one's spouses and one's spouses' spouses) would number 217. A more moderately extended family gathering - such as a Thanksgiving dinner, with grandparents, parents, uncles, aunts and cousins - would number in the thousands.
The economic implications are similarly staggering. If you're like me, you probably keep a little mental inventory of relatives who have a useful skill or own a business - your brother-in-law the electrician, your cousin the lawyer and so on. People tend to do business with relatives, whether out of a greater sense of trust and loyalty or out of the expectation of a discount. In a both-gender polygamous society, the entire economy would be based on buying from your relatives. Anyone going into a skilled trade or profession would instantly have a locked-in clientele numbering in the thousands.
Of course, there would be downsides. Heaven knows, just because people are related to one another doesn't guarantee that they will like each other and get along. Establishing the paternity of children would be next to impossible without a DNA test (but, on the other hand, perhaps that wouldn't matter so much in such a village-raising-a-child environment.)
It's all very curious to think about. What do you think? What would you see as being the upsides and downsides of a both-gender polygamous society?
posted by Mentok @ 11:55 a.m.,
14 Comments:
-
At 3:50 p.m.,
Bathroom Hippo said...
-
As a Mormon I feel I have an obligation to comment.
I have different feelings about polygamy... As a Christian I really don't think God is offended by it because he allowed it in the Old Testament period, and I don't think it matters to him now...as long as everyone in the marriage is treated well. Legality is another issue.
As for my feelings. Polygamy disgusts me. Now the only problem I have with polygamy is not the marriage itself. As long as everyone in the marriage is happy and productive then that doesn't bother me. The problem I have is with the children. Children raised with polygamist parents are typically brainwashed. They observe at an early age things that shouldn't be observed. Their families are too close....closeness is fine...but there is a boundary. Also they're typically brainwashed into some form of religion or another.
As for legality. I'm purely libertarian. I think it should be up to the States whether to recognize any kind of marriage. I'd rather call myself a Federalist than a libertarian though. -
At 4:32 p.m.,
Library Mama said...
-
I suppose it's simply because I don't have testosterone coursing through my loins, but I simply have no idea why someone would want more than one spouse.
I mean - really - with all of the (small p) politics that one has to go through to keep one relationship on an even keel, why would anyone want to be juggling more than one?
Is it a sex thing? Am I just too naive?
And, Hippo, you bring up the subject of children. I understand that women in a polygamistic situation tend to help one another raise their children, because the father is spreading himself so thin, he's rarely around to help. I'm not sure this situation could work for me. I think it's very important for the father to be around.
Just my two cents worth... -
At 12:56 a.m.,
Rachel said...
-
I agree with Mrs. Mentok...I have no clue what planet those who practice polygamy live on because it sure isn't any planet made for human beings...Well at least one human being such as myself.
Of course, there would be downsides. Heaven knows, just because people are related to one another doesn't guarantee that they will like each other and get along.
This is an understatement to say the least...Can you imagine? It would be like having Christmas dinner but EVERYDAY! I am getting antsy just thinking about...
As an only child there is NO possible way I would share my spouse with anyone. No thank you. -
At 5:11 a.m.,
Bathroom Hippo said...
-
I am now a practicing polygamist. Thank you very much Mr. Mentok.
(Sarcasm) -
At 7:22 a.m.,
Library Mama said...
-
Practice makes perfect, Hippo.
;-p -
At 9:58 a.m.,
FiL said...
-
Higamous, hogamous
Woman's monogamous
Hogamus, higamous
Man is polygamous
(N.B. Penned by an Irish priest my Dearest Wife once knew. Not carnally, I hasten to add.) -
At 10:02 a.m.,
Mentok said...
-
Hippo - remind me someday to discuss the religious arguments about polygamy in my pretentious profundity site. As for children being brainwashed...well, don't all families try to brainwash kids to one degree or another?
LM - your point about "politics" within a marriage is perhaps the most important observation about the topic. Can you imagine the comparisons, the jealousy and the constant negotiation and arguments over every little thing that would go on in a polygamous marriage? It staggers the imagination.
Rachel - another important point you allude to is the oft-discussed difference in attitudes in relationships between men and women, the so called "hunter vs nester" difference. My guess is that even if women had the option of multiple husbands almost none of them would have the slightest interest in it, which would lead us back again to an inequitable, exploitive situation full of emotional land mines.
Hippo - how many times do I have to tell you to keep yer mitts offin ma woman? ;-) -
At 10:05 a.m.,
Mentok said...
-
FiL - you snuck in while I was typing the last. Funny poem! Gotta love the Irish.
In light of the circle of people commenting on this, may I suggest a small re-write:
Hippamous, Potamus
Woman is monogamous
Potamus, Hippamous...
...you get the idea.
My funny word verification is St. Xlept. He was Greek, wasn't he FiL? -
At 12:16 p.m.,
Bathroom Hippo said...
-
Hippo Potamus,
Likes Mentoks Wif-a-mus,
And there's nothin he can,
dooo about it,
cuzz B-Hips got the,
groove and that's it! -
At 3:03 p.m.,
Library Mama said...
-
Thank you, Hippo. I like you too, but I love my Mentok.
And I have absolutely no interest in polygamy!
Word verification: imopy
I'm Opy?
Or maybe I Mopy? -
At 7:56 a.m.,
said...
-
I'm late commenting here. Where's your RSS feed button darnit.
I have watched Star Trek and I didn't know about Dr. Flox's weirdo society. Perhaps that explains the way he looks, ha,ha..
Short of the experimentation in inbreeding by the Royal Family and the people in the Ozarks I didn't know marrying relatives was legal.
And how many mooching relatives could one man, or woman, actually stand.. -
At 9:01 a.m.,
Suzan Abrams, email: suzanabrams@live.co.uk said...
-
Mentok, I like the idea of - ok, bypass the 6 wives but after that - 5 additional husbands for each wife. Sounds strangely cool!
I think the word 'harem' fits somewhere between the sheets of this post very well. -
At 8:01 p.m.,
NL-ExPatriate said...
-
Thought you might appreciate this photo.
http://imageserver4.textamerica.com/user.images.x/71/IMG_456871/125x125/_0330/TZ200330200126132.jpg?125.125.456871.2
I think it is the name of some sort of sports team and the girl is a cheer leader. -
At 12:18 p.m.,
said...
-
Having more than one woman to deal with sounds like a nightmare to me!
