Monday, July 10, 2006
Mayor "Totally Fed Up" With Town's Lack of Mardi Gras Spirit
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Grannies Gone Wild" Event Flops In More Ways Than One
Brock, AZ (FN) - John Hudson, mayor of Brock, Arizona, declared today that he is "washing his hands" of the community's tourism development program after coping with many years of "sucky attitudes" from the townsfolk at large.
The sleepy retirement community of approximately 5,000 has for the past five years attempted to position itself within the growing college tourism industry. Largely at Hudson's urging, the town created an event called "Parti Gras" held during the first week of July.
"No matter whether you approve or disapprove, half-naked, drunken, sophomoric tourism events are a big growth industry. Now, with New Orleans out of the picture, we figured we had a real shot at becoming the next big destination," says Hudson.
Hudson convinced the town to spend ever-increasing amounts on campus advertising and subsidized tour packages. Despite these efforts, few college students appeared to be interested in holidaying in a community where the average age is 67.
According to Hudson, the program's fortunes rested entirely with creating a positive party atmosphere. During recent Parti Gras celebrations, the mayor was scene cruising the streets with a handful of bead-strings and a megaphone, shouting "S-U-Y-T" to local women. Residents were distinctly unenthusiastic about the mayor's antics.
"He's been doing that for years, but I didn't know what it meant. Then someone told me what the 'T' stood for. Well, I never! Someone should take that young man out and wash his mouth out with soap," declared Delores Adams, 77.
The mayor's boosterism likewise met with a muted response from the few college students who showed up.
"The worst part wasn't the people who weren't responding but the ones who were. I saw this chick my grandma's age whip her top off to get some beads. Man, it was pretty gross. What is it about chicks and beads, eh?" said Gary, a Kansas junior who asked to remain anonymous.
posted by Mentok @ 12:02 p.m.,
4 Comments:
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At 3:07 a.m.,
A. B. Chairiet said...
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"'Then someone told me what the 'T' stood for. Well, I never! Someone should take that young man out and wash his mouth out with soap'..."
Yes. Soap. I like soap too.
And by the way: Kansas college students don't say "eh".
I believe your Canadianship is showing. ;)
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Happy Tuesday,
~ Ash -
At 9:02 p.m.,
jamwall said...
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show us your orthapedic girdle!!!
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At 8:24 a.m.,
Library Mama said...
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I can understand why Delores would be offended.
I mean, she probably had false ones, and that's why she was sensitive about showing off her teeth.
That is what the T stands for, isn't it?? -
At 9:34 a.m.,
Mentok said...
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LM - LOL! Very funny, esp the bit about the "false ones". Ha!
Ash - yes, I made a particular point to avoid use the T word. Yeah, I wondered if someone would catch the superfluous "eh" in there. It's such an ingrained part of Canadian idiom that I literally could not think of an alternate way to phrase that thought.
