Thursday, April 27, 2006
Crack Dealers Adopt Responsible Marketing
New York (FN) - An upscale New York hotel was the site of the historic first meeting of the American Crystal Cocaine Manufacturers Association (ACCMA).
ACCMA is part of a grassroots effort to develop a more positive, community-centered image for an industry that contributes more than $35 billion a year to the American economy.
"Given the fact that tens of millions of people smoke crack in this country, and countless others would seek to eliminate it altogether, there may never be agreement on whether crack cocaine can be marketed responsibly. What ACCMA is here to do is to make an honest effort at finding that agreement," said association founder Jeffery "Dev Dog" Douglas.
The inaugural meeting approved a series of resolutions on responsible crack marketing.
"How can an industry that produces a dangerous and addictive product like crack cocaine market that product in a way that's acceptable to society? What kind of an industry would it need to be? It would need to be open and honest about the dangers of crack. It wouldn't market to children. It would search for ways to reduce the harm associated with crack. It would willingly accept comprehensive and meaningful federal regulatory authority over crystal cocaine products."
"For its customers who have decided to quit, it would help them find the resources they need to be successful. This is the kind of crack cocaine industry the ACCMA seeks to be," said Douglas in the closing address.
As a first effort towards its new goals, ACCMA announced that all members would participate in a voluntary labelling program.
"Dime bags will now come printed with a skull and crossbones and a simple, direct message: 'Crack Will Fuck You Up'. That is the sort of message I believe our customers will understand," said Douglas.
The labelling program will be funded by the association, through a check-off levy on sales to street-level dealers.
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posted by Mentok @ 10:38 p.m.,
5 Comments:
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At 11:13 p.m.,
Mentok said...
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...And now for the punch-line: Everything in quotes is taken from a tobacco industry website, with the word "crack" substituted for "tobacco".
This probably only seems funny to me, since I'm a recovering nic addict and all. ;-) -
At 3:46 a.m.,
Bathroom Hippo said...
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Just put an aborted baby on the cigerette box. Or better yet...Ted Kennedy. Who'd want to smoke now? -
At 6:59 a.m.,
A. B. Chairiet said...
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I honestly think they should just stop making cigarettes. And alcohol, fast food, Coke, candy, sugar, guns, drugs, and everything else that's bad for you.
Except coffee...I love coffee. ;)
Glad you're still not smoking.
Congrats on that. :)
~ Ash -
At 12:07 a.m.,
said...
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What. The. Fuck?
Are these people serious? I'll read again and try to form some kind of a coherent response. Ridiculous. -
At 2:51 a.m.,
said...
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Oh wow. Now I feel like a dumbass. New rule: Always read comments thoroughly before commenting myself.
