Tuesday, March 07, 2006
Porn Contains Terror Messages, HSA Says
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| Jenna Jameson: Terror operative? |
Federal investigators discovered that 75 minutes of every porn movie sold and rented in the United States contains terrorist training videos on topics ranging from how to make a bomb to how to blend in with middle-class neighbourhoods.
"Every video. Every single one. I am as astounded as the next man. Apparently, for perhaps as long as a decade, all adult-rated films have contained only 15 minutes of actual porn followed by an hour and fifteen minutes of secret terror training. You could have knocked me over with a feather," said Special Agent Gary Mathers of the FBI.
Agency analysts theorize that Al Quaida may have developed the scheme after discovering that most porn viewers abruptly "lose interest" after approximately 15 minutes of viewing.
The scheme came to light by accident after an unnamed senior HSA manager fell asleep with his video machine still running during a late-night porn session. The manager was awoken suddenly by loud explosion sounds on an Al Quaida video entitled "Steppin' Out: The Right and Wrong Way To Use Shoe Explosives."
"Pardon the pun, but our discovery of that tape was a real stroke of luck," said Mathers.
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posted by Mentok @ 4:08 p.m.,
6 Comments:
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At 5:57 p.m.,
Bathroom Hippo said...
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I think you should do a follow-up....this time with more pictures.
Fascinating, absolutetly titillating.
Good job Mentok! OO-WEE-OO-baby -
At 6:18 a.m.,
A. B. Chairiet said...
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I vote "no more pictures," but maybe that's just me. ;)
Happy Wednesday,
~ Ash -
At 9:57 p.m.,
Bathroom Hippo said...
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Ashley knows she likes it.
Ooooooooooooh Bebe'
Mama Mia. -
At 10:32 p.m.,
mkecurler said...
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God, I love Jenna's work. Love those training videos!
Does that make me part of the network....uhhhohhh! -
At 4:42 p.m.,
Mentok said...
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Yes, sabatkes, Jenna's "body" of work is quite "heady", isn't it? Har, har.
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At 6:40 p.m.,
said...
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I just noticed her nips were showing.
