Tuesday, October 11, 2005
Canada Announces New China Kiss-Ass Campaign
Ottawa (FN) - The Canadian Department of Foreign Affairs and International Trade will be trying to win the hearts and minds of Chinese opinion leaders with a new multi-media presentation, department officials announced today. This intiative is the latest in the Liberal government's efforts to boost trade with China.
Entitled "Canada: Please Don't Hurt Us", the presentation will be packaged as a CD sent directly to top Communist Party officials and business leaders in the burgeoning economic super-power.
Officials describe the disk as having three main sections:
- "Me Love You Long Time". This segment features footage of Canadian politicians bowing and scraping to visiting Chinese officials. It also includes one-on-one interviews with leading Canadians professing their admiration for the people, culture and government of China.
- "Me Likey Special Flied Lice". This segment describes the long history of positive relations and cross-culturalization between China and Canada.
- "With two you get egg-roll". This segment summarizes the many advantages China would enjoy in trading with Canada.
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[URGENT Clarification: I don't think I need to say this for my friend Dan, who regularly calls me a "honky", but I should make it clear to everyone else that I am not, not, NOT anti-Chinese. I plan to have my kids learn Chinese when they're older. The point of this piece of comedy is to mock the incompetence, stupidity and fatuousness of Liberals, not to mock Chinese. The Liberals, after all, are the government whose idea of improving US relations is to have our ambassador call their government "dysfunctional". That's the joke, get it, Liberals are dumb, ha, ha. Please do not report me for hate-crimes. Thanks. - Mentok]
posted by Mentok @ 10:57 a.m.,
