Tuesday, September 06, 2005
More Fake News
Today I was going to start writing serious commentary about New Orleans, but it looks like the mainstream media is already beating to death all the angles e.g. race and class divisions, federal incompetence. So, what the hell, let's just keep the comedy going:
BIG EASY SEES SPIKE IN ZOMBIES
One bright spot in the New Orleans hurricane disaster is that the city is enjoying a renaissance of its undead community, says Mayor Roy Noggin.
"Pardon my French, America, but with all the voodoo shit we got going on down here, we usually have 500 or so zombies walking around the city. Now its into the thousands. Our zombie citizens are usually subject to the worst kinds of stereotypes, but they are the ones who have been the most determined to stay with the city and help us rebuild. They deserve credit for that," said Noggin.
Contrary to movie depictions, zombies, or life-challenged Americans as they prefer to be called, are created when a normal person is given a Haitian potion that induces a state of suspended animation but may also induce brain-damage, especially if the zombified person is buried alive during the zombification.
ALCA (Association of Life-Challenged Americans) spokesman Jebodiah Grant welcomed Noggin's statement.
"Brains...brains," said Grant.
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posted by Mentok @ 11:32 a.m.,
1 Comments:
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At 9:53 p.m.,
NL-ExPatriate said...
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Freaking militant forum!
http://www.zombiehunters.org/main.html
Live scanner of NewOrleans area
http://stfunoob.com/nola/scanner.pls
